the last blog was post #69. figures it'd be the one where i was talking about being screwed all the time. if there are no coincidences why do things always seem so contrived.
to update on that last rant, i did manage to finish my resume today. even if i didn't do my laundry or clean up much else of my room, i did manage to finish that. i even saved it on my flash drive because you just never know who you're going to meet who might be hiring.
so there! ha!
uhh....*sigh*
fight 'em til we can't. 1229/072408
Thursday, July 24, 2008
Wednesday, July 23, 2008
Dark Knight
last night we [giant, grapegum, madratter] went to see the Dark Knight. it was a great action movie, good storytelling, good acting all together. it's a shame heath ledger did not see the outcome of his movie; batman in general is a crowd pleaser. the movie made $18.5mil alone at the midnight showing on opening day.
batman is an interesting character because i think it shows the possibilities of (wo)man. i'm not saying we should all have a huge tragedy happen in our lives so that each individual makes a difference in the world. but we don't all to sit on our ass all day and not feel like we've contributed positively or negatively in our world.
[aside] honestly, i think that's what gets me 95% of the time at work. what does working in a hotel do to make the world better or my life more fulfilling. it's just putting out fires with guest complaints and being subjected to the dramas of 3 dozen people on a daily basis. honestly i was better off working the PM shifts because even if the rooms weren't ready or we were short on something, i went home after 10 hours. people aren't f-ing adults, they don't take responsibility for being adults, they all play games, and if thrown in the real world they'd sh!t their f-ing pants. ok, maybe not all. there are the select few who know the differences between want and need. and generally, myself included, i think people just whine too much. it's what 99% of the population is good for. rightfully so, i'm disgusted with myself at the moment for sitting on the terrace blogging while there's work to be done. on the other hand, i'm tired as fcuk. seriously every day it's the same little things at work, same complaints, same problems, same lame ass dramas. it's a good thing some people are on vacation.
speaking of vacation, i really need to take one. either that or file for a mental health leave or something. i'm not sure why i don't stand up for myself. or make my life better. i keep telling myself to finish my resume but giant made a perceived condescending observation that while i'm miserable at my job, i seem to be perfectly comfortable staying there despite all the health problems i am undoubtedly getting because of that place. instead of being subjected to a sudden traumatic event, mine is slowly being stretched on for the last 3 years. i'm dead serious when i say i'm going to blame alot of health issues on that hotel. it's got bad karma, bad energy. ulcers, tumors, cancer [from the asbestos], constant migraines, even ptsd (post traumatic stress disorder). i should get a therapist.
speaking of therapist, that's what batman should've gotten. the duality of a man. a madman tempered by humanity. tragedy's a bitch i tell you. there are some days i feel like the family is toppling because for some reason i thought my parents would live f-ing forever. and now that one's gone, it's a broken formation; there's a drill sergeant missing. the psychology of batman is going to be playing on the history channel this weekend. i hope i remember to watch it; i'll probably forget. the old man wants to go Borgata this weekend. maybe i'll win something at the slots, enough for an unnecessary coach bag at the outlets down there.
i keep saying i need to make change and i can't get myself out of this rut. it's not even the all encompassing, final kind of destruction i'm doing to myself. it's more the passive, stroll to a slow practical death. i'm not happy, bottom line. i'm amused by things, interest is peaked on certain things but generally i have no desire to expend energy on anything. and once i get through the hurdle = lack of motivation, my life would start to pick up and my happiness would eventually increase. i look at those around me, upper management for example. do i really want to be there? do i really want to aspire to be that kind of a person? and giant said he will not have our relationship dictated by a j-o-b. it's not even a career. and right now i make no money, comparatively, to the position i hold and the work i do. it's f-ing ridiculous. sweatshop workers are subjected to conditions as such because they have no choice/desperation or society traps them in social classes forced to work in those conditions. a social essay aside, i'm not one of those people. this is a voluntary imprisonment. all i'm saying is sweatshop workers know what they are in for and no i'm not being insensitive to their lives or their poverty. i have no idea why i'm being abused, most often by people ruled by their whims, mood swings, hedonistic goals, or who's life is monitored by their own stupidity or ignorance. i work long hours, frustrated by lack of tools, lack of motivating appreciative leaders, and general malcontent towards the machine. and yet i don't have to be.
the world is a tough place and people are sheltered. sheltered by their class, their financial situation, their parents. everyone should at least know what it's like to be really hungry and not know when you're going to eat next.
1608 hrs/072308
batman is an interesting character because i think it shows the possibilities of (wo)man. i'm not saying we should all have a huge tragedy happen in our lives so that each individual makes a difference in the world. but we don't all to sit on our ass all day and not feel like we've contributed positively or negatively in our world.
[aside] honestly, i think that's what gets me 95% of the time at work. what does working in a hotel do to make the world better or my life more fulfilling. it's just putting out fires with guest complaints and being subjected to the dramas of 3 dozen people on a daily basis. honestly i was better off working the PM shifts because even if the rooms weren't ready or we were short on something, i went home after 10 hours. people aren't f-ing adults, they don't take responsibility for being adults, they all play games, and if thrown in the real world they'd sh!t their f-ing pants. ok, maybe not all. there are the select few who know the differences between want and need. and generally, myself included, i think people just whine too much. it's what 99% of the population is good for. rightfully so, i'm disgusted with myself at the moment for sitting on the terrace blogging while there's work to be done. on the other hand, i'm tired as fcuk. seriously every day it's the same little things at work, same complaints, same problems, same lame ass dramas. it's a good thing some people are on vacation.
speaking of vacation, i really need to take one. either that or file for a mental health leave or something. i'm not sure why i don't stand up for myself. or make my life better. i keep telling myself to finish my resume but giant made a perceived condescending observation that while i'm miserable at my job, i seem to be perfectly comfortable staying there despite all the health problems i am undoubtedly getting because of that place. instead of being subjected to a sudden traumatic event, mine is slowly being stretched on for the last 3 years. i'm dead serious when i say i'm going to blame alot of health issues on that hotel. it's got bad karma, bad energy. ulcers, tumors, cancer [from the asbestos], constant migraines, even ptsd (post traumatic stress disorder). i should get a therapist.
speaking of therapist, that's what batman should've gotten. the duality of a man. a madman tempered by humanity. tragedy's a bitch i tell you. there are some days i feel like the family is toppling because for some reason i thought my parents would live f-ing forever. and now that one's gone, it's a broken formation; there's a drill sergeant missing. the psychology of batman is going to be playing on the history channel this weekend. i hope i remember to watch it; i'll probably forget. the old man wants to go Borgata this weekend. maybe i'll win something at the slots, enough for an unnecessary coach bag at the outlets down there.
i keep saying i need to make change and i can't get myself out of this rut. it's not even the all encompassing, final kind of destruction i'm doing to myself. it's more the passive, stroll to a slow practical death. i'm not happy, bottom line. i'm amused by things, interest is peaked on certain things but generally i have no desire to expend energy on anything. and once i get through the hurdle = lack of motivation, my life would start to pick up and my happiness would eventually increase. i look at those around me, upper management for example. do i really want to be there? do i really want to aspire to be that kind of a person? and giant said he will not have our relationship dictated by a j-o-b. it's not even a career. and right now i make no money, comparatively, to the position i hold and the work i do. it's f-ing ridiculous. sweatshop workers are subjected to conditions as such because they have no choice/desperation or society traps them in social classes forced to work in those conditions. a social essay aside, i'm not one of those people. this is a voluntary imprisonment. all i'm saying is sweatshop workers know what they are in for and no i'm not being insensitive to their lives or their poverty. i have no idea why i'm being abused, most often by people ruled by their whims, mood swings, hedonistic goals, or who's life is monitored by their own stupidity or ignorance. i work long hours, frustrated by lack of tools, lack of motivating appreciative leaders, and general malcontent towards the machine. and yet i don't have to be.
the world is a tough place and people are sheltered. sheltered by their class, their financial situation, their parents. everyone should at least know what it's like to be really hungry and not know when you're going to eat next.
1608 hrs/072308
Sunday, July 20, 2008
mohawk
tay picked me up today. i forgot to get my dry cleaning while i was at it; i'm down 4 suits. i gave him a venezuelan cancer stick and he stood on the porch steps grinning. i didn't notice the old man had a mohawk. madratter gave him a haircut today. not sure if he's gonna keep it for work though. give the old man props. he's right, if he goes senile we won't notice. hahahaha
speaking of work, with pepe's grandma in peru, the kid'll be here the whole summer. we're trying to figure out how to salvage what's left of our weekend downtimes but it's gonna be rough considering we can't take the kid no more than 5 miles from here. sucks. we wanna see dark knight but the movie ain't for her and who the hell else is gonna watch the runt? not for nothing, i love the kid but she's like a ball of 5 year old crazy! LoL
on other news, oldrat is going white water rafting. grapegum is trying to hit the beach. giant, myself, madratter are gonna end up with pepe. the old man will probably chauffeur. i just need to get shiet done.
fight 'em til we can't. 1233hrs/072008
speaking of work, with pepe's grandma in peru, the kid'll be here the whole summer. we're trying to figure out how to salvage what's left of our weekend downtimes but it's gonna be rough considering we can't take the kid no more than 5 miles from here. sucks. we wanna see dark knight but the movie ain't for her and who the hell else is gonna watch the runt? not for nothing, i love the kid but she's like a ball of 5 year old crazy! LoL
on other news, oldrat is going white water rafting. grapegum is trying to hit the beach. giant, myself, madratter are gonna end up with pepe. the old man will probably chauffeur. i just need to get shiet done.
fight 'em til we can't. 1233hrs/072008
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
hey now, you're an all star
the all-star game went into 15 innings last night with the AL 4-3 win over NL. it went on until 2am i think. i'm tired, i could barely stay awake to watch the game. but yay for the american league!
on other breaking news, i went to tiffany's with chasingamy yesterday. it was a last minute trip that we had decided on. chasingamy is anticipating quite a fight, for custody and the dissolution of her marriage. he's a douche for walking out on his wife and 4 month old son, and i personally think he should get whatever rights she deems worthy. she's not a monster, a son should have a father. but considering his actions, the court should really take that into consideration. she should have full custody and he should support his son. chasingamy had been saving a little bit of money just for herself as soon enough, all her money will be going to these court proceedings. regardless, it's not like we went nuts. we don't have money anyway! lol
we came out of there with one ring each. very beautiful rings from the frank gehry line, torque collection. they are conservative with a twist, she got narrow silver band model and i got the open one. when trying them out, they fit better that way but we originally had our eye on the open one. chasingamy could get the open one but where it on her ring finger with the narrow band on the pointer finger. i'm wearing the open ring on my pointer finger and the narrow band would look hot on my ring finger. lol.... we are ring buddies. we walked in there and decided we couldn't be bracelet buddies, like on friends LOL.
we walked down fifth ave, past all those stores that smelled like money and wished to win the lotto. after our initial high wore off, we got really tired and nauseous for spending moolah we could've saved for a rainy day. Lord knows the lawyers are after me on my bills. i just don't make enough, sorry! we went to europa cafe, split an avocado/tomato/cucumber sandwish and each had a little something sweet. macaroon for her, chocolate pretzel for me, and we each had an iced coffee. we sat and chatted for awhile, random stuff. of course we opened our little blue boxes and admired our rings. like i whispered in the store "why is she wrapping it? i'm gonna wear that sh!t home." then we walked back to g-mount, peed, showed them off to our colleagues and went our separate ways home.
all in all, a decent day. decent only because i had to work & i'm sure there's some fallout from yesterday about something or another. like how the am staff i supposedly managed had been telling people to come back later in the evening to room move. otherwise it would've been a really nice day. it doesn't take much for me these days, even if we didn't buy anything from tiffany's. i'm so burned out & if the lawyers hadn't taken my money...i'd have run away by now. anyway, let me see if i can get friday off. i'm owed.
i'll try to keep in mind what someone said, soco's a motherf*ckin soldier.
fight 'em til you can't. 071608/1204hrs.
on other breaking news, i went to tiffany's with chasingamy yesterday. it was a last minute trip that we had decided on. chasingamy is anticipating quite a fight, for custody and the dissolution of her marriage. he's a douche for walking out on his wife and 4 month old son, and i personally think he should get whatever rights she deems worthy. she's not a monster, a son should have a father. but considering his actions, the court should really take that into consideration. she should have full custody and he should support his son. chasingamy had been saving a little bit of money just for herself as soon enough, all her money will be going to these court proceedings. regardless, it's not like we went nuts. we don't have money anyway! lol
we came out of there with one ring each. very beautiful rings from the frank gehry line, torque collection. they are conservative with a twist, she got narrow silver band model and i got the open one. when trying them out, they fit better that way but we originally had our eye on the open one. chasingamy could get the open one but where it on her ring finger with the narrow band on the pointer finger. i'm wearing the open ring on my pointer finger and the narrow band would look hot on my ring finger. lol.... we are ring buddies. we walked in there and decided we couldn't be bracelet buddies, like on friends LOL.
we walked down fifth ave, past all those stores that smelled like money and wished to win the lotto. after our initial high wore off, we got really tired and nauseous for spending moolah we could've saved for a rainy day. Lord knows the lawyers are after me on my bills. i just don't make enough, sorry! we went to europa cafe, split an avocado/tomato/cucumber sandwish and each had a little something sweet. macaroon for her, chocolate pretzel for me, and we each had an iced coffee. we sat and chatted for awhile, random stuff. of course we opened our little blue boxes and admired our rings. like i whispered in the store "why is she wrapping it? i'm gonna wear that sh!t home." then we walked back to g-mount, peed, showed them off to our colleagues and went our separate ways home.
all in all, a decent day. decent only because i had to work & i'm sure there's some fallout from yesterday about something or another. like how the am staff i supposedly managed had been telling people to come back later in the evening to room move. otherwise it would've been a really nice day. it doesn't take much for me these days, even if we didn't buy anything from tiffany's. i'm so burned out & if the lawyers hadn't taken my money...i'd have run away by now. anyway, let me see if i can get friday off. i'm owed.
i'll try to keep in mind what someone said, soco's a motherf*ckin soldier.
fight 'em til you can't. 071608/1204hrs.
Sunday, July 6, 2008
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